An all out war!!

Well, it seems we are officially in war with Ally's school!! On friday we had a major issue regarding Ally, the dress code and mainly the way in which she was treated and violated. It's a huge mess! I'm going to attach the letter we've written to the superintendent and asst. superintendent we are waiting for a phone call to find a time when Jonathan and I can meet with them. It is a mess, but I just wanted to make sure everyone is aware that our kids have rights and we as parents have rights-don't ever let any school administration bully or intimidate your child or you. After all of this has happened so many parents have told me about things that have happened to their child at this school but felt there was nothing that could be done...THERE IS! There are some things worth fighting for-and children are one of them!!

I am writing this letter in regards to an issue that occurred at ------------- School on Friday, November 9th, 2007, involving my daughter Allyson Manwaring.
On Friday morning I sent my daughter to school wearing the same uniform shorts she has worn since the beginning of the school year. No one, including and especially her teacher, Ms. -----, has ever said they were inappropriate.
Allyson arrived at school a few minutes early and went into the office as a safe place since there were no teachers or parents out on the playground yet. Rather than asking Allyson if she needed help or why she was in the office,----------, the office manager, told her that she was in violation of the dress code. She informed Allyson that she would need to go to the nurse’s office and take her shorts off and put on some that they provided her with. My daughter was obviously upset and crying at this time thinking that first she had broken the rules and then had to take her clothes off and change them.
When I arrived at the school to see Ally, she was in the nurse’s office still very upset, sitting by herself trying to find some sort of comfort alone.
I attempted to get some answers from the principal and other staff members and was verbally attacked and treated with a complete lack of professionalism and respect. More importantly, there was no concern for my daughter. I never received a straight or specific answer as to why my daughter was in violation of the dress code except that her shorts were the wrong color of khaki. Nor was I told that my daughter had been asked to change her clothes as she had been told to put her own shorts back on before I arrived at the school.
I was also lied to, saying that my daughter was only crying because she had missed me. There is a problem with this because first of all, Allyson has never cried at school because she misses me. Second, if Allyson was in fact crying and saying she needed her mother, it is because she did not feel safe with the school’s administration. She wanted her mother because a school employee asked her to take her clothes off. The school’s administration bullied her and then abandoned her. She was not allowed to be with her teacher whom she trusts.
There are four major issues with respect to the situation.
First of all, a school employee having requested Ally to change her pants on school grounds is offensive, inappropriate, and most likely illegal. If it is in fact the policy of the school to have children changing their clothes pursuant to a dress code violation, then the policy needs to be changed. It could open the door to child abuse and other inappropriate behavior. It also could very well be a violation of Arizona Code Section 13-3623 which makes it a felony to cause or permit "a child or vulnerable adult to be placed in a situation where the person or health of the child or vulnerable adult is endangered." Allyson’s overall physical, emotional, and intellectual well-being was endangered because of this incident.
Second of all, the administration failed to follow the standards for dress code violations set forth in the School Handbook. On a first violation, a student is given a verbal warning with a written note sent home to the parents. Rather than follow this procedure, it appears that the principal and others preferred to get a power trip by bullying a 5 year old who has no say in where her clothes are purchased or what she even wears on a certain day of school. If the procedures had been followed, then this entire incident could have been avoided.
Third, the principal and others were unable to give me an adequate explanation as to how my daughter's shorts violated the dress code. She said that the shorts had to be khaki instead of tan. I was under the understanding that “tan” is also considered “khaki”. If the dress code is going to be administrated in a manner that splits hairs, then it must be more specific in its language and descriptions of permitted and prohibited items of clothing.
Finally, my daughter was bullied, placed in a very uncomfortable position, and then abandoned pursuant to this process. She now has issues with school. There can be nothing more devastating to a child than to be accused of some wrongdoing when the child has no idea that he/she did something wrong. How can a 5 year old be punished for a dress code violation? It is no wonder that Ally was devastated when a complete stranger told her there was something wrong with her clothes, told her to change, told she could not see her teacher, and then left by herself in the nurses' office. She was ganged up on and bullied by complete strangers and left by herself without any familiar face around. The entire matter of the dress code violation should have been dealt with through me and my husband and not Allyson.
We, as Allyson’s parents and also concerned members of the community, fear that our child and other children are attending a school in an unsafe environment. I was shocked to find out the way in which I was treated as an adult who can defend myself, I can’t imagine the manner in which children are treated. As people who are there to ensure the safety at school, they are instead humiliating, intimidating and traumatizing innocent children. We do not trust their judgment or character in dealing with children. This school has an anti-bullying policy, we never in a million years would have thought that it would be the office staff doing the bullying. It is our desire that these practices be stopped in whatever manner is necessary to ensure that our daughter and all other children that attend Abraham Lincoln are safe and secure. We look forward to meeting with you and hope to solve this issue as quickly and quietly as possible. Thank you so much for your understanding.


Sorry this is so long!!!