Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Home At Last, Home at Last

Okay guys, I will start my own personal blog since I use this one as my own anyway. Your all probably sick of hearing from me. Whatever, Jenny got me pumped up already for girl's weekend next year. So, we made it home and we are finally one big happy family all together again. Okay, maybe we aren't so big because all you guys keep poppin' em out like rabbits. I love it though, don't get me wrong. But as I was talking to Trent we wondered if it was just our class that is like this. I mean, even for mormons, we ALL have a lot of kids in a short period of time. Most of the other mormons we have met have theirs spread out a bit more or are done after two or three. I guess it doesn't matter, but I think it is funny that we are all the same.
Anyway, Trent doesn't have to go to Guam so hurray and it is not likely that he will go to Iraq, so we are hoping he will only have to do one deployment for the whole payback period.
It is so nice to be together again and have a helping hand.
I do have a dilema. Lane isn't doing so great with the potty-training and this is the third attempt. Any suggestions. He will go, but only when he wants to and it's convenient. He's not scared of it, just plain out defiant and /or lazy. Also, what do you do when you have a picky eater? make him eat it, give him a new healthy option, let him starve, make two dinners??? yeah, life is fun isn't it.

10 comments:

hughes family said...

karie, i love hearing about what you guys are up to! YEA that trent didn't have to go to guam and that you guys are back together again in ND! I have NO suggestions on the potty thing. eva will be 3 in dec. and we haven't really tried to 'train' her yet, but she shows ZERO interest in the toilet whatsoever. its frustrating. i'm not sure when to try it with her, i don't want a battle, but i don't want to wipe her smelly rump anymore either. the other three trained pretty quickly, isa and jones at about age 3 and charles at about 3.5-4.
as for picky eaters, i feel like a pro on the subject. :) personally, at the end of the day (dinner) food is the LAST battle i wish to wage. I usually give two options--one is, if i think there is ANYTHING on the table that i'm making that charles will eat (even if its just a roll) then thats what he gets. same with everyone else. they have to eat something from the table, even if its just a scoop of corn or a muffin or whatever. personally, i don't believe in "making" them eat something, again, i'm too tired for that kind of mind game, especially since if charles doesn't like something he will gag and vomit. who wants to clean THAT up at dinner?? the other option, if i think he won't eat anything from what i'm offering, is i'll make a batch of ramen noodles (cheap, tasty, FULL of protein and good 'stuff' and they take 3 min. in the microwave) so they can either eat what i made or have ramen, but no other choices, take it or leave it. i try to accomodate to him a little on some things, like if i'm making spaghetti, i always have a bowl of alfredo for him since he won't eat anything 'red'. so, he's still eating what we're eating, but everyone gets an option of what color sauce they have. or if we're having something 'mexican', i will make up a plain tortilla and cheese. tough part is, eva is starting to prefer charles' foods over the usual, but its okay, like i said i don't make a major change in our menu for them, so its not a big deal. anyway, its so hard, but i remind myself often that he eats fairly decent during the day (sandwiches, tortillas and cheese, some fruit, etc) that by nighttime when i've HAD IT, i feel like as long as his tummy gets full and it doesn't require *major* out-of-my-way accomodation on my part, then i'm totally fine with him being picky. anyway, you have to find the philosophy that works for you on the picky food thing, and decide how much mental energy and frustration you really have to throw at the issue. everyone has different ideas and different things work for different kids/moms.
Funny you mention the 'lots of kids' thing, because we're having another one. Joni???!! i will need serious tips on managing 5. actually, more than managing 5, i'm more worried about dealing with all the nutcases that feel they need to preach to me on why i have too many children to start with! ha ha! anyway, we're excited, i'm about 12 weeks along, due in may. so, can you tell why i don't want to sit in the bathroom trying to potty train right now? bleh. and fighting the picky eater? NO energy for that either. :) sorry so long, but potty and picky eaters are a big part of my life!! :)good luck! love,
meg

hughes family said...

sorry such a long comment! yikes, karie, i should have just emailed you...

Adam Jensen said...

Congratulations Megan!!!! That is great! I love all these babies. I go back and forth about if I want to wait two or three year before the next. I keep telling myself that Hayden has to be walking however long that takes but if he's 3 and still not walking which I hope not! Then we will try regardless. I can't believe in 2 months he will be 1!
I can't stand it when people give you flack about how many kids you have, I mean that is the most personal decision a couple could make. How could someone comment on that??? So rude!
Anyway as far as advice... don't have much. I have struggled with Kyler on potty training too when I try again it will be our 3rd attempt. Maybe since you guys are moving around it's been hard for him. Kyler was potty trained all but poop and night time and then totally regressed when we moved and Adam was gone for 3 weeks. I am hoping it is easier next time. And as far as picky eaters Kyler isn't too bad but I do remember reading Jessica Seinfeld's cook book and it has tons of tips on picky eaters. Also she has a lot of recipes for regular dishes that have pureed vegetables in them. Kinda cool. Anyway I am so glad you are all together again!!! I know how hard that is. Horray!!!

The Kalcichs said...

Karie, I'm always so glad when you post! That's awesome that Trent doesn't have to go to Guam. Hopefully you guys can enjoy some down time at home. I wish I had some advice for you - all I can say is that I think everyone is facing some or all of the same problems - so you're not alone. I know you're doing a great job as a wife and mother.

Megan-
Congratulations! I have been thinking about you so much lately. I forgot how much work it is having a newborn and I always wonder how you did it with three at once. If anyone can handle the transition into five kids - it's you! And Joni! How do you girls do it? Rock's crying, but I'll be thinking of all of you! Gotta run.
-Ann

The Mathews Family said...

This is so exciting!! A post from Karie and a huge announcement from Megan!! Just made my day ladies :)

Karie- This last time around with Charlie was a nightmare. The only wisdom I feel I've gained is that each child is different and potty training is such a testimony to that! It feels like it will never end and then one day... it does. SO.... I'll just say a little prayer that that day comes very soon for you, k? :) I'm so glad Trent is home and that you don't have to send him off to Guam! As for the picky eater thing, I tried Dr. Phil's "eat it or starve" approach and my kids were fine with starving.... that is until my back was turned and they could raid the cupboards. I just put what I'd like them to eat on their plate (really small portions). I encourage them to at least take one bite of everything and if they do and want to be done- fine. We have a major rule here, though. Dinner is IT! If you don't eat your dinner, you don't eat anything until breakfast. No dessert, no snacks. Since the portions are so small, I usually end up having to give them more of what they DO like, but that's fine with me.

Megan- CONGRATULATIONS!! What fabulous news and I couldn't be happier for you guys! Keep us posted and good luck with potty training while pregnant- UGH!

Maggie said...

I have no ideas about potty training. Jade is almost 3 1/2 and has no desire to be potty trained. I have tried pushing it and have only frustrated myself. I am trying the wait it out method. I am sure Elise who will be two in Feb. will potty train before Jade. She has much more intrest and has even peed in the potty something Jade can only dream of.
About the food, I only feed my kids what I make. If they don't like it they can have as much as they want at breakfast. We don't even mention it, that is just the unspoken rule. Also the book The Sneaky Chef is supposed to be the original book to Jessica Seinfeld's ripoff. My friend swears by this. I don't care either way.
Congratulations Megan!! I am so glad you shared your big long post with us. I would have been sad to miss out on the info you provided.

Jill said...

Karie, I know we all can relate to both of your dilemas. Glad to hear Trent is staying in Minot. You should have him show Layne how to go potty, (I'm shaking my head at my use of the word potty). or show him since he is a boy he could go outside and aim at something. Taylor would never sit down for me after seeing caden and dad stand to pee. Someone told us to put something in the toilet they can aim at and have them stand on a stool if they are too short for the toilet. With Taylor we just kind of asked him if he wanted to go on the toilet like Ella and Caden every once in awhile until it became all the time and he only went poop in a diaper and somehow that is now on the toilet too since the baby was born. he was really good to us with the whole potty training thing.
Boy do I hear ya about the picky eater, I don't even fight with Caden at all anymore even though I should. He eats no fruits or veggies whatsoever, ok corn and potatoes, but I don't even count those as real veggies. Anyway its all about the battles we choose. I think it really depends on the food we have in our homes as to what we want them to eat or not eat. and since I will continue to buy junk food, I know caden will continue to refuse to eat healthy foods.
Megan congratulations that is so exciting. I hope you are feeling well or at least getting past the nausea. I hear you about people's comments on the number of kids. I've been telling people even in the mormon world 3 is the new 6 and 4 is the new 8, so that makes people who actually have 5 or 6 kids have enormous families to everyone else out there. Though Dr. Erickson just says, so i'll see you in a couple years for another little cutie right? so refreshing after everyone else's eyes pop out when I say I don't know if I'm done.
any way another totally long post. loved reading everyones comments, and it makes me really look forward to next years girls night.

banks said...

Karie,
Yeah that Trent is home for a long while it sounds like.

Megan,
I have been wondering when you were going to post about being pregnant. I am soooo happy for you. You have such good motherhood skills. Congrats again.

I hope all you new moms are adjusting to your new additions.
love you all. Kami

Shelly and Ken said...

Jordan was very stubborn when it came to potty training (and I had to do it twice cause she totally digressed when we moved to Ohio). She just didn't care if she peed all over herself. I think the thing that helps is to make peeing in their pants worse than going in the toliet. A big celebration should occur when they go on the toliet and if they pee or poop in their clothes, I would make them clean it all up by their self. I would make them do everything. I wouldn't help them in anyway, other then with words "now go get a rag to clean up the mess." Very hard to do from the mom side cause they are slow and don't clean very well. I am SO dreading potty training Caden, it is definitely one of my least favorite things about being a mom.

I try to have a variety at dinner: Main course and a couple sides (salad, cooked veges, fruit salad, rolls, etc). Hopefully they will like something but if they don't want to eat anything they don't get anything else to eat until breakfast. Caden is very picky and it can be very frustrating. I hate it cause he doesn't even want to try things and just refuses to eat it.

Congratulations Megan. That is really exciting!

I am so glad to hear that others get the rude comments about the size of your families. I just went to Washington this last weekend for a friend's wedding (a nonmember) and I can't believe how out right rude people could be when they found out I had 3 kids and one on the way. A girl that had known me in High School was in shock that I would "waste" my talent and intelligence to stay home and raise kids (and so many of them) instead of pursuing a career. People often looked at me as if I am completely crazy. It can get old. I also agree with who ever said that even in the LDS community it can be a problem. "Big Families" definitely has a different meaning today in the LDS community than it did 30 years ago.

Joni said...

Karie, I am so excited that Trent isn't going to Guam. Not that Guam wouldn't have been a fun experience but I am excited that your family is able to stay together. I pray there are no more deployments for you all. I don't know what to tell you about potty training. I am currently training Hope. I agree that each kid is so different that it is hard to give a "this works every time" kind of an answer. I've never trained boys either... so good luck with that. Same with the food thing. One thing that I was taught in a child food class though was that a parent is responsible to choose what foods are available and when they are available. A childs responsiblity is to eat what they want of the foods offered and how much of it they eat. All of the foods offered should a varity of the things they need nutritionaly. Any sweets or junk is something that is offered outside of meal times and can be offered at a snack time contingent on if they have been eating the healthy things being offered to them. That advice has helped me at least not feel guilty when one of my girls refuse to eat a well balanced meal.

I totally know what you all mean about the comments about a large family. We cant make it through walmart without a dozen "is this a daycare," "are they all yours???", "how many are you planning on having?", "you know what causes this don't you?", or my all time favorite, "are you going to keep trying until you get that boy?" (as if that is the reason we keep having children) I have noticed though that when my children are behaving themselves in the store we get positive comments and on days when one of my little ones is having a rough moment I get the "why are you still having children you crazy women, you cant even control the ones you have" comments. It used to upset me and almost make me feel embarrassed (like I was doing something wrong having so many kids) Now it doesn't bother me. I joy in the role of mother and even in the crazy moments, we are doing the greatest work of all time. Behind the most influential people of all time, stood a mother that helped them reach that potential.
Megan, Congrats! You are going to do just fine, hurry and have that baby so you can give me advice! 4 was easy, five has been a new level of learning to balance the needs of everyone. Fun though! Sorry this is so long! I guess I am just in a way chatty mood!