YOU GUYS!!! WHEN DOES THIS GET EASIER????!!!!!!?????
James is on Inpatient Peds now. He goes in at 5:00 am and last night didn't get home until almost 8:00pm! He kissed the boys goodnight, watched an episode of Simpsons, and then crashed. The way things are going, this week he will work 105+ hours!!! I thought there were rules out there about this?!?!? ANyOne?? If I have this baby during this rotation we're in real trouble!
Dillon started Kindergarten on Monday and those of you who read my blog entry about the whole thing know that I am stressin' big time about it. HE's FINE, but I am a WRECK! Could this really just be all hormones? Joni compared it to giving birth, and I giggled, but I"M NOT GIGGLING ANYMORE! My heart has been ripped out of my chest and wrung out to dry! (drama anyone?)
Here's the link to my blog entry where I've posted tons of cute pics and a video Jenny's Blog
No, it wasn't all bad, and I've come to terms with some of the issues, but c'mon- the worksheets he's brought home this week are like preschool 2 years ago stuff. Remember that little joy school at Joni's? THAT stuff!
I was griping to James about it the day he was post call (poor guy) and then bawling about my new calling as RS teacher, my aching hips, my broken back and my new stretch marks when he nonchalantly commented,
"Well at least you don't have any REAL problems."
I wanted to smack him, but now I realize he's totally right. As far as the pregnancy goes, everything is coming along great! No HBP nothing concerning - just normal aches and pains. We're all doing fine and have so much to be thankful for. Why isn't I can't find the strength to shift my focus away from the negative?? There are quite a few of YOU GUYS who I could really learn from. I appreciate that.
Deep breath.
7 comments:
Jenny, I am sorry thing are a little difficult right now. We just need to go and have our own girls night. I'll give you a call. Brett is on call every fourth day, so he is gone alot also. You may not have any "real" problems, but problems are problems none the less. Hang in there. Kami
Jenny,
OK, about the school thing-it's totally normal for kindergarteners to do very easy, easy worksheets at first...very normal. Believe me, it will pass by quickly. I taught school for 3 years before we moved to AZ 1st, 2nd, 3rd grade-and it was the same thing. As easy as you can make it-there are lots of reasons, but mainly to build confidence. If they are not into kindergarten curriculum by the 2nd month-then worry. You'll have to look online and find the actual standards as to what they should know by the end of kindergarten-I bet you'll find that Dillon already infact knows most of them! It's so hard. The good news is that he has an amazing mother who takes the time to teach him so much at home-and that will go farther than anything he will EVER learn in school!!! It may not be reading, writing and math that he learns the most...it will be the far more important stuff like, how to be a friend, how to listen, how to be a team-mate, how to share, how to be independent, ect... This intern year is a BEAST and having a new kindergartener on top is too much! I can't imagine also having a baby-you are dang tough! And you can cry and complain all you need-it does help! Your family is beautiful-it's so fun to see them!! Thinking of you!
Jenny I agree that this is tough. For me for about a couple weeks I was so negative. I kept thinking maybe I have depression but I have decided it is just the stress of everything. Well anyway I am feeling better now but Jason is the one who has a bad attitude. If I talk to him it seems that this year will never end even though he is now 1/6 of the way done (with the first year)!! That is huge. Maybe we all need an advent calendar to focus on the end of the year or something. Good luck.
Jenny I can totally sympathize. Altough it was a little oppisite with Ella and school,(I was looking forward to her being gone full day.) She hates being gone so long and says she misses me, I think it is about an hour too long for me. It's hard. So not only was I stressed with moving and the horrible schedules all our husbands seem to have, Ella was stressing too. She is finally enjoying school in her new class. School is easy for her too, it was last year as well. It must be do to the great pre-school they were in. I have been kind of negative lately myself. That is part of the reason I haven't posted. Sometimes it feels like I'm a single parent, because of work. Hopefully next rotation isn't so killer for you.
-Rachel your comments are always so positive, I totally appreciate your positive outlook.
Good luck girl,
Jill
OK- so the other day I was talking to my sister about my break down and she brought up a good point. Dr. Phil has all these stress factors that you calculate the stress level in your life. Some of them are moving, a new job, new baby, lack of sleep, change in schedule - sound familiar? We are like going through post-traumatic stress. Or maybe is ongoing-traumatic stress. Anyway, I don't think you should feel bad for feeling stressed out and overwhelmed. I think it's amazing that you're keeping it together - you know where both kids are right now, right? Or all three kids, I should say. That counts for a lot. Anyway, you're a champ. Hang in there and by the way - the nursery looks so cute. Will you e-mail me your address so I can send baby girl Matthews a little something something.
Thanks,
Ann
I knew I could count on you guys to cheer me up! No really, it helps so much. There's just nothing like the empathy I KNOW you all have for me. I actually remember watching an episode of Dr Phil about that a while back... There's like a checklist. I'm going to look that up. It's always nice to find a good excuse for my craziness and know that I'm not just mental! AND my OBGYN here suggested that I get some counseling. She even sent in a referral. When they called me, I talked myself out of it. Thing is, trying to find babysitters for my psychiatry appointments would just add to my stress! ;) I totally realize that these things are all temporary and to tell you the truth, I feel like this IS my therapy! ;) THanks guys.
jenny, i'm sorry you (well, ALL of us!) are in such stress right now. the other girls are right, this is a HUGE life change for us! i think part of my problem too is that as we came to teh end of med school it was easy to feel like "we made it!!" and even though people told me "intern year is harder than med school" i refused to comprehend that, since school was VERY hard and we had so many stressful things go on with our kids during that time. anyway, i think i fell into a false sense of relief, thinking, "oh, we'll have more money, life will be great" but, man, i feel like we are just as strapped financially as we were in med school, and he is gone SO much more, and bills seem so much more, and our house is bigger, and it costs more than our house in AZ, etc, etc. anyway, i think my point is we are coming down off this huge high of finishing med school, but really, it was just a step from one really hard thing to another, with really no break in between and really NO WAY to transition, we've just had to dive into it. hope that makes sense, i'm really tired tonight. ok, james' timing for his comment was bad, i admit...ha ha! but his point is true-- we are so blessed to have relatively healthy children, families, the gospel, eachother, great spouses who are doing stuff i wouldn't do in a million years and in 3 years or so, things will (maybe!) change a little when they get *real* jobs. ha ha!!
miss you gals,love, meg
Post a Comment